Sounds of Silence

I have another great example British customer service. My phone. Mind you, I have lived in my new place for four weeks and I don't have a phone. Allegedly, the line is on and in somebody else's name, but I can't get it to work. This has me cut off from Broadband, which is all I really care about.

I called on 3 November to transfer my line-rental-only account with British Telephone [BT] to my new address in Wimbledon. The guy that I talked to on the phone said that the line was still active, probably with the previous tenant, could I get them to cancel the account. I said I'd check, but to start the process anyway. He said it would take 5 days to transfer my account if the line was available and 15 days to transfer my account if I couldn't get the previous tenant to cancel the account. There is no new line having to be installed. The number doesn't even change, but this is the way it is. I know perfectly well that I won't have a phone on 18 November, but there doesn't seem to be a way around it.

Then life gets in the way. I don't dare call BT from my house because I would only have my cell phone. It's a charge call from your mobile AND I would likely have to spend half of the day on hold means I had best attack this from a land line. So on Friday of this week [the 28th] a full 25 days since my first attempt, I call BT.

Call #1: I call 0800 800 150 and my phone number. "Our records show that we have sent your recent bill. If you're calling about your bill, press 1; if not, press 2" I found the number on web site about 12 pages into the site. I can't, of course, request the account change on line. I have to call. I got lost in the Options and ended up in some place that wanted me to buy telephone equipments. I hung up.

Call #2: I call 0800 800 150 and my phone number. "Our records show that we have sent your recent bill. If you're calling about your bill, press 1; if not, press 2" ... I followed the options until I got to one that told me I could hold for a customer service rep. I told him that I was trying to follow up on a an order to transfer my account. This did not translate. I told him that I moved recently from Bristol to Wimbledon and I wanted to transfer my account. He told me I needed to speak the moving house team and I should call them at 0800 800 150. I told him I just called that number and that's how I found him. Right. Okay, he'll transfer me. Then he says, "there will be silence then a que, am I okay with that?" I said, "Am I okay with what?" He repeats, "I will transfer you to the moving house team and there will be silence then a que, am I okay with that?" Sure. Whatever, I just want to get this completed.

I was "in the que" [on hold] for nearly two minutes and there were sounds of several transfers in the meantime, and then the line went dead.

Call #3: I call 0800 800 150 and my phone number. "Our records show that we have sent your recent bill. If you're calling about your bill, press 1; if not, press 2" ... and I try to follow options until I get one for a customer service rep. This rep tells me he can't help me and that I need to speak to the Moving House team and their number is 0800 800 150. And I say, "yes, I've called that number now three times and I found you." He says, "Right, well it's the options that are important. You want Opt. 1, then Opt. 2." The line goes dead.

Call #4: I call 0800 800 150 and my phone number. "Our records show that we have sent your recent bill. If you're calling about your bill, press 1; if not, press 2". I follow the instructions as the rep gave me, and I got lost because after Opt. 1 then Opt. 2, you're given another 4 options. I try Opt 1. Wrong. I hang up.

Call #5: I call 0800 800 150 and my phone number. "Our records show that we have sent your recent bill. If you're calling about your bill, press 1; if not, press 2". I follow the instructions as the rep gave me, and I got lost because after Opt. 1 then Opt. 2, you're given another 4 options. I try Opt 2. Wrong. I hang up.

Call #6: I call 0800 800 150 and my phone number. "Our records show that we have sent your recent bill. If you're calling about your bill, press 1; if not, press 2". I follow the instructions as the rep gave me, and I got lost because after Opt. 1 then Opt. 2, you're given another 4 options. I try Opt 3. Wrong. I hang up.

Call #7: I call 0800 800 150 and my phone number. "Our records show that we have sent your recent bill. If you're calling about your bill, press 1; if not, press 2". I decide that the rep did not know what he was talking about, so after Opt. 2, I listened to the next four options:
Opt.1 products
Opt.2 bill
Opt. 3 moving home
Opt.4 help w/service

Hmmm... don't recall being told there was a moving home option anywhere. So I dial 3 and I get a moving home rep. And I have to give my home number, again. And I tell them I want to check on an order to move my account. "Do you have an order number?" No. "Okay, let me check," and I'm put on hold. The rep comes back and tells me the order was never placed. "Okay, well what do I have to do to place the order?"
"Let me check," and I'm put on hold.
"Right. Well the previous tenant still has their name on the account. Can you get them to cancel?"
"No, you told me that on 3 November and I told you that I do not own the property."
"Right. Well, if you can't get the previous occupant to cancel the account, then it will take three weeks before we can transfer the account in your name."
"Yes, you told me that on 3 November, just put the order in so that I can have a phone."
"Right. Please hold."
Then the rep comes back, "Right, well, I've place the order, but I'm afraid it won't be until 12 Dec when you have a phone."
"Okay, tell me, if the phone is currently active and we are just trying to transfer my name to the account, why doesn't the line work?"
"Oh, well that could be for a number of reasons. I could transfer you to submit a work order."
I say, "no".
"Okay. Is there anything else that I can do for you today?"
"Yes, can you please give me the work order number?"

And the rep says [and I am not lying], "do you really think you'll need it?"

Happy Thanksgiving!

I sat across from a woman on the Tube [subway] yesterday that confidently announced as she boarded she "wasn't sure what to do with (her) new walker".

After sitting down, she shared that it was new. As we continued our journey, she shared with me that she was 85. She said, "Pretty good, don't you think?" and I couldn't help but agree with her.

Showed me the features of her new walker. It had a compartment for her purse, two cup holders and a seat if she needed a rest. She even opened it up so I could see how well it rolled. After opening it, she declared that she'd better collapse it again or someone might complain. Mind you, she and I were the only two in the car.

She said it's important to keep moving, and I agreed. She was on her way to Morrison's. She wanted to know if I had been there and I said, "No". She said it was a shop with good Scottish food at a good price [Morrison's is one of the largest food chains in the UK; it's hardly a "shop".] Just out of the Tube and off to the right.

And she shared some hard candy with me. She said it was good for when you're mouth is dry. She gave me one for now and one for my pocket.

Loved her spirit. Happy Thanksgiving all!

Crazy lady on the Commons ... and no Wombles in site!

I think this falls under the category: moving to the big city.

I took the dogs for a walk on the Common this mourning. It's cold. It's blustery. The sun is just up. And they are running around like freed prisoners because we didn't walk last night. They've done their thing. I've picked after them. They've played with a few dogs. We've scared all of the birds to the middle of the lake, and we are ready to head back across and home.

A woman is walking towards me. Dogs are way off to the side and as she approaches, she is yelling in a foreign tongue. She is easily 100 yards away. Did I mention it's blustery? As we get closer, I realise she is yelling at me. This peaks Allie's interest and so she happily gallops towards the woman who is now yelling in English, "I will call the police!", and begins spinning in a circle, I think swinging her purse at Allie who has now arrived at her side.

She stomps her foot and shouts again, "I will call the police!" And by now Misty has arrived because clearly, I am playing a game. I call the girls and they happily charge towards me and we turn and give this woman a wide birth.

About 50 steps beyond, I pass a man also crossing the Common and he simply smiles and says, "good mourning". A mourning of two extremes.

I shared my story with my British team and they quickly responded asking me if I had seen any Wombles? What's a Womble? Well!??

The Wombles were created in a series of children's novels from 1968. The characters later became nationally famous in the mid 1970s as a result of a popular BBC children's television show. A number of spin-off novelty songs also became major hits in the British music charts.

Wombles are pointy-nosed furry creatures that live in burrows, where they help the environment by collecting and recycling rubbish in useful and ingenious ways. Their motto is Make Good Use of Bad Rubbish. This "green" message was a reflection of the ecology movement of the 1970s. Although Wombles live in every country in the world, the stories focus on the life of the burrow in Wimbledon Common in London, England.

We've come full circle. Bizzar day to begin with and now I feel like I found a little humour.

Chargers v. Saints at Wembley Stadium ... 26 October

Yes, a month ago, I went to an American football game at Wembley Stadium in London and haven't had time [or Internet access] to publish the post.

The New Orleans Saints were the home team playing the San Diego Chargers. This is the second time the NFL has had a regular season game outside of the U.S. Last year, the Miami Dolphins played the New York Giants. Anyway, the Saints won, 37-32. It was a good game. Crowd was sold out. I cannot believe how expensive the tickets were though!

I went at a guest of an organisation that is looking for folks to put businesses in Northern Ireland. We had a champagne lunch prior to the game, complete with a jazz band from New Orleans, a characature artist and an open bar, then our seats were on the 40th yard line, 4th row. The price of the ticket was £500. Given today's exchange rate, that's about $750!!! Is it that expensive to go to a football game these days? I've only been one other time, so I have no idea, but who could afford it!??

I think the coin toss-er [tosser is not a good word in the UK] was British gold medalist swimmer, Rebecca Adlington.

Wimbledon Common

Yesterday, the girls and I made it to Wimbledon Commons in daylight. We stumbled upon it a few nights ago, but didn't move too far into it. We did, however, see a fox. I moved to the city and the wildlife followed. The Common butts right up against Wimbledon Village. In the village, there are lanes for the cars to drive, sidewalks for the people, and narrow lanes for the horses to pass through town on their way for a ride on the Commons! I saw the lanes the first couple of walks that we took to the Village, but I thought they were bike lanes. Nope!

Anyway, the Commons are just a few blocks away. They have been legally protected since 1871 from being enclosed or built upon. They are for the benefit of local people for informal recreation and the preservation of natural flora and fauna. There is an area of bog, the western slopes, and woodland. The woods are mostly Aspen trees, so it was a lot like walking through a field in Minnesota, only warmer!

A windmill stands near the centre of Wimbledon Common (I didn't find that yet), distinguished by being the place where Robert Baden-Powell wrote parts of Scouting for Boys, which was published in 1908.

We walked for a couple of hours and did not find the end of the Commons. We did find a pond, and the pond had railroad tie sides. I think Misty decided that a wade in the pond would be good, but she soon found out that she couldn't get out. I had to pull her out. Now before she went in, she had rolled in something dead, so I was relieved that she was rinsed off, but as soon as she got out of the water, she rolled in the grass and in something else dead and came home smelling worse!

We found the golf course. This is another example of the UK combining uses for land. Walkers and dogs and players [all wearing red] criss-crossed the golf course. I think this is the first time that the dogs have been on a golf course, at least as much as I can remember. They are not very good at staying on one single trail [so as not to distract the golfers] and they certainly didn't like waiting for the golfers to play through when we were crossing the fairways.

Anyway, it is a really nice green space. We'll be out some more to explore.

Bonjour!

Alright, after an unbelievable week, I made it to Paris! And thank God! It is nice to have something fun to focus on! I am in Paris this weekend visiting with my friend, Bill. He has been in France for the last month visiting his daughter and her family in the South of France.

I arrived at Charles du Gaul airport around 915pm Paris-time on Friday night. I am staying at the Le Dokhan's Sofitel Hotel, http://www.dokhans-sofitel-paris.com/, and I can highly recommend it. Bill says that the hotel has the oldest champagne bar in Paris. I did a little Google-ing to see if I could get that verified. No such luck, but I have no reason to doubt it. You get to choose your glass, and of course, your champagne. The environment is really cool. Quiet. Restful. Just a place to enjoy your champagne and company.

The elevator / lift / acsenseur is VERY small. It says that has room for four. Bill calls it a torture chamber. I think it looks like the inside of a Louis Vuitton travelers trunk!

We have spent our time doing a lot of walking! I am wearing my pedometer, and we have done more than 18,000 steps per day! Yesterday, we walked to the Arc de Triomphe and down the Avenue des Champs. Two things struck me. First, the streets are so wide. It's really nice. I wonder if they seem so wide to me because everything seems so narrow in the UK?

The second thing is that it is not so crowded that you can't make your way down the boulevard. Again, I think it has to do with my experience in London. Our office is in Mayfair, a busy shopping destination. It is constantly wall-to-wall people!

We made our way down Avenue des Champs to the Musee du Lourve. We didn't go in, but of course, had discussions about reading the book and watching the movie, "The Da Vinci Code"!

We continued down the Seine [river] to Notre Dame. There was a great [and very entertaining] band playing out in front of the church, entertaining the long lines of people that we waiting to get inside.

We had lunch at Cafe' de Flore. http://www.flickr.com/photos/44548980@N00/176809296/

Café de Flore sits on the corner of the Boulevard Saint-Germain and the Rue St. Benoit, in the VIe arrondissement of Paris, France. Historically, it has been famed for its intellectual clientele. Classic Art Deco interior of all red seating, mahogany and mirrors has changed little since World War II. Like its main rival, Les Deux Magots, it has hosted most of the French intellectuals during the post-war years. It is said that Jean-Paul Sartre and Simone de Beauvoir would meet here and discuss their philosophy of existentialism over a drink.

It was very good and very local French and frequented by the whose-who, I guess. After lunch, we headed down Boulevard Saint-Germain, back across the Seine and down the Avenue des Champs. We stopped along the way for a Coke / glass of wine. Then back on the street, back to our hotel for a much needed REST!

We had dinner just down the street from the hotel at again, another local place, patronised mostly by local French. Always a good sign. This restaurant had a pigs leg mounted on the bar. The leg / flesh had been cured or smoked and it was sitting on two pedestals, like something that would hold a wine bottle on its side. The leg still had the hoof, and where the leg had not yet carved, the flesh still had fur. I'm not sure what you had to order [I'm really good I didn't figure it out!], but the bartender would take a large carving knife and shave off a plateful of bacon [?] and send it to the table.

This mourning, after breakfast, we headed out to find the Tour Eiffel. A funny thing happened to us on the way to the Eiffel Tower ... we turned the wrong way and got lost. It's only a 10-minute walk to the Tower from our hotel, so one would think that you could see it within five minutes. Or 30! We ended heading North, instead of South and finding large park after crossing the outer loop [motorway]. There were lots of runners, folks walking dogs, and men playing boccie ball in the park, but not where we wanted to be! We turned around and headed back from where we came and stopped for lunch at Scossa, another great place for local French. I'm going to gain 10 pounds before I leave here this weekend!

After lunch, we went passed our hotel and walked the 10 minutes to Tour Eiffel. Very cool. More people around, but still not overwhelming. I'm planning to walk back tonight to see the tower light up like my two nieces showed me when they were here last May.

Moving House, take 2 & Guy Fawkes Night

Seriously. This falls into another chapter of You Can't Make This Up! This was all yesterday, mind you.

Packers
Showed up an hour late. Truck is broken. The truck place sent a guy to run dignostics on truck to confirm it's broken.
Yep.
One packer had to leave to take it back. Now why didn't the guy sent to run the diagnostics come in an alternative truck, just in case?

Redirection at Post Office (Forwarding mail):
I filled out the form on-line before disassembling my home office, but couldn't submit on line because I have been a resident for less than a year. I took it to the Post Office. Post Mistress doesn't like the Net forms because the print is too small.
She announces [felt like it anyway], I didn't sign the form.
I need one form of identification from box A (passport) and two from box B (utility bills....which are all paperless).

I left to get two proofs of address (from list B) with fingers crossed that I had printed something within the last six months and that they hadn't been packed (in luck! Broken truck has stalled actually packing process!).
I signed the form.

Returned to Post Office:
Right. Well, you've signed in blue and they like black for scanning purposes. This will delay the process.
Form is out of date.
I ask, Should we start with a new form?
Her answer, well, they should have right form on the Net. [I guess we're going to use the form and continue to complain about it.]

I paid £37.40 to forward mail for a year. I wonder if it's a year from when requested, or when they finally start?

British Telephone (BT):
I have a rental line only. The last tenant (actually, it is the landlord, not the last tenant) never cancelled the account in their name. If I can get them to cancel, it will take 5 days to transfer the line. If not,15. Mind you, there is no new number assigned or anything. The number stays with the address.

Sky Satellite / telephone / broadband:
Waiting for BT. I am officially, once again, cut off!

Also accomplished:
Hired houise cleaners for house (one less thing to do!).
Booked service and MOT [some tri-annual check-up] for (ugly) Renault.
Booked annual check up for dogs.

Returned to Wimbledon:
Truck arrived 530. Dogs locked in master whilst guys unlaoded truck. Upset a neighbour by breaking culdesac parking rules. Dogs further stressed by neighbours shooting fireworks in honour of Guy Fawkes Night. Ashes falling on balcony!

Guy Fawkes Night (also known as Bonfire Night, Cracker Night, Fireworks Night):
Annual celebration on the evening of the 5th of November, celebrating the foiling of the Gunpowder Plot of the 5th of November 1605 in which a number of Catholic conspirators, including Guy Fawkes, attempted to blow up the Houses of Parliament in London. It was compulsory [required], by Royal Decree, to celebrate the deliverance of the King until 1859, but also in former British colonies including New Zealand, parts of Canada, and parts of the British Caribbean. It is also celebrated in the British Overseas Territory of Bermuda. Festivities are centred on the use of fireworks and the lighting of bonfires.

Still moving ...

It was an unbelievably draining week last week, and it seems to be spilling over into this week. More of the same. I dropped the dogs at the kennel on Wednesday. I left Thursday morning [530am from my house] for a train to London [that's South from Bristol] to meet my boss and a colleague to catch a train to Derbyshire [that's North from London]. We got to the station to find that our PA's [personal assistants] had purchased tickets for the wrong date. A quick run to the ticket machine, and then a dash to catch the train.

We had a three-hour journey followed by a 2-hour meeting followed by a 2-hour dinner and finished with a three-hour journey back to London, arriving sometime after Midnight. On the way back to London, we missed the last train out of Derbyshire for London, so we caught a train to Birmingham [that's headed further North], only to have to switch trains [we had seven minutes] which involved RUNNING from one train, under ground, up stairs, over tracks, down stairs and onto the platform ... to catch the train to London. When I arrived at the station, the taxi driver told me my hotel was close ... as to suggest that I walk. Whatever, dude!

On Friday, I was supposed to make a journey to West Kent [South of London] for an all-day meeting. I also needed to be in London for a budget meeting. The budget meeting began at 900am and was to end at Noon. At 1100, I sent a note that I was not likely to make it to the meeting at all and we were pushing on through lunch ... and then through dinner! I left the office at 845pm and headed for Paddington. I caught a 915pm train to Bristol Parkway and then took a taxi to Bristol Temple Meads where my car was parked, and back to my house, arriving around 1130pm.

At 730am Saturday, the packers were to arrive. I was up and moving about. They showed up with a junior moving van and no wardrobe boxes. They improvised by removing my hanging clothes from the two [Ikea] wardrobes I had, moving the wardrobes onto the van and then replacing the clothes. Once the truck was full [hanging clothes, dresser, two beds, most of the kitchen, couch and kitchen table/chairs], I raced them to London ... and beat them by nearly 3 hours. I was ready for a nap! Of course it was raining. In all, I got about 1/3 of my stuff moved to my new place in Wimbledon Village.

Sunday morning, I travelled back to Bristol, rescued the dogs from the kennel, and packed up some essentials, like bath towels, toiletries, my TV, and dog food and the girls and I journeyed back to London.

I'm at work today. Monday's are big sales pipeline days. Tomorrow, I am heading back to Bristol to meet the packers, take 2, that are bringing a truck twice the size of Saturday's to hopefully finish the move, once-and-for-all. I haven't even started the stories about transferring the phone, cable, broadband ... it should all be sorted about Christmas. And this, I am not making up!